Help Yourself?…How?

I want to share a little something with you and that something is, that sometimes we all colourful-baboonfeel down in the dumps, useless, worthless and sometimes we believe that we don’t want to be here anymore. There are so many us that suffer from physical illness, mental illness, bullying, financial breakdown, work stress and plain old low self esteem. We constantly stay rooted to the same old routine that we think is working fine and is ‘just life’. If your thinking, ‘I try to help myself but nothing ever works’, then honestly your not doing the best job that you can, are you?

  1. Stop playing the victim. I think this is the biggest, most powerful and probably the toughest step to get your head around as we all think that we are a victim in some way. We all wallow in self pity, be honest! But in order to help yourself, you need to stop playing this victim part in your life play. No matter what you suffer with in life, there is always a positive outlook, a positive action that can make your life that little bit happier. And if you say ‘What’s the point?’, which I admit to saying plenty of times. The point is that you are in control of your life, no one else and its up to you to design it. If you get bogged down in depression and think ‘What’s the point?’ That amount of negativity and absolute hell that you constantly feel will never leave you. So your basically doing it to yourself, time and time again.
  2. You have to take responsibility for your life, because its not the external factors that hinder us. We stop ourselves. Sure, some things can have a pretty big impact and get in the way. But that’s it, they’re in the way. MOVE THEM!
  3. You may not realise this, but you are a bundle of conditioned responses that operate outside of your control. You think your in control, but really you think negative, destructive thoughts and engage in self hate and harmful behaviours. But then you go and defend these behaviours with some poor logic like, ‘I deserved it’. When people try to give you empathy or positivity, you continue to unconsciously ignore them thinking ‘its too hard’ and instead you therefore carry on with your usual life routine that you may think is just the way things are meant to be. And then you wonder why your life doesn’t work the way you want it to.
  4. We only have control over 3 things in life- That’s it! Our thoughts, the images we visualise in our heads and then the actions/behaviour we take. If you don’t take control of these aspects of yourself and just carry on letting your habits run on by, you end up in the same conditioned response that you always have to a situation. ‘I can’t do it’ BULL SHIT!!!

You can always make a change. Be it a positive attitude, reframing your thoughts, rationalizing or maybe engaging with yourself and doing what you actually want to do, not what you think you should. You wont change over night with a flick of fairy dust, be realistic! But you can help yourself in whatever situation you are in.

I have suffered from an eating disorder, depression and self harm for years and I’m still fighting. But the difference is that this time I’m fighting hard because I don’t want to carry on living in my conditioned responses. In one afternoon I experienced my ‘happy’ feeling and I want to do everything that I can to help myself and sustain that feeling for as long as I live
You can do it too, tell yourself you can and you will!
-Robyn Sno

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